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“From Heartbreak to Hollywood: My Bold Revenge Plan on the A-List Star Dating My Ex”

Ah, love—what a whimsical yet agonizing game, right? One moment you’re indulging in a cozy bubble of affection, and the next, it all bursts like a balloon on a stiletto! Under this dazzling Venus influence, when hearts entwine, they can also unravel in spectacular fashion. Such is the case for our unwitting heroine, who finds herself standing in the most perplexing intersection of heartbreak and ambition. As she brushes the remnants of a breakup off her cheek (and, let’s be honest, probably off her social media feed too), she’s faced with a cosmic dilemma: how does one bounce back from losing a partner to someone strutting down the A-list runway of fame? Perched on the cusp of transformation, she decides that the way to reclaim her power is—brace yourselves—to become famous herself! Buckle up, darling readers, for this isn’t just a story about love and loss; it’s an odyssey of self-discovery wrapped in a sprinkle of stardust and a dash of righteous revenge. Want to peek inside this rollercoaster of emotions? LEARN MORE.

“But I really like making you sandwiches,” I whimper. The Man says he doesn’t believe catering to him will make me happy. He wants autonomy, not a pet. 

I’ve just stepped, catlike, out of the shower, in his short-term Los Angeles rental where I have been half-living since day three of our meeting, three months ago. He is in a rush to get to work — and away from me.

While brushing his teeth, he tells me it’s over. His parting words: “And wipe your face!”

Stunned, I make a circle in the foggy mirror and see a strand of white snot hanging from my nose. I am a loser.

One week later, I was gently informed by a friend that The Man had already moved on. To someone famous. A-list famous. Before I could catch my breath, it was headline news. On TV, on my phone, even in a magazine in the grocery store checkout line — there they were, “canoodling.”

I spent the rest of that week slumping around, blubbering. Unable to eat. Heart crushed. Ego obliterated. Shame spiraling after seeing myself through the harsh light of his baby blues. Every unbearable feeling I poured into an epic breakup song, smearing the ink in my notebook with tears.

When his mother emailed me a photo from our recent visit (apparently unaware of his upgrade), my sadness turned to rage.

“I’ll show him,” I thought, narrowing my eyes, steam coming out of my ears. Out loud — so the fairies, the universe, God and my best friend could hear — I proclaimed: “He will see me! He will hear me! He won’t be able to escape me!”

To get back at him — or get him back — I would have to become famous. 

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