Friendship or Frenemy? Unmasking the 3 Sneaky “Nice” Bullies Sabotaging Your Squad—Your Zodiac Won’t See This Coming!
Added on September 20, 2025 inASTROLOGY CARDS
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Ever had that moment when you’re buzzing with excitement about a new venture or gearing up to end a relationship you KNOW is past its sell-by date—and then you blurt it out to your closest pals, expecting cheers, only to be met with polite skepticism that stings worse than a Mars retrograde? Yeah, been there, done that, got the painful T-shirt. It’s like your nearest and dearest suddenly morph into these “nice bullies” who, bless their hearts, think they’re protecting you but end up tossing cold water all over your blazing dreams. Today’s cosmic climate totally vibes with this—Mercury’s doing that tricky dance that confuses intentions, so maybe it’s no surprise that our well-meaning friends sometimes sound more like naysayers. Let me walk you through the trio of these unintentional dream dampeners hiding in your friend group: the overprotective Nurturer, the know-it-all Expert, and the relentless Taskmaster. Because trust me, deciphering their “helpful” critiques might just save your sanity—and your big, bright vision. LEARN MORE.
We’ve all been there. Whether it’s a business we’re excited to start or a relationship we know must end, we finally have clarity about some major element in our lives. We reach a point where the possibilities excite us more than our fear of the change itself.
So we start telling friends and family our grand plans, genuinely expecting to hear things like, “I know you can do it,” and “I’ve been waiting for you to show your greatness!” Instead, some of the people we trusted to have our backs surprise us with messages like “I don’t think you have the right background,” or “Do you have any idea how hard this is going to be?!” Let me introduce you to what I like to call the “unintentional bullies” in your life.
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Often, the people who love you the most are the ones closest to home. It can be as obvious as your mother or anyone who has played a caretaking role in your life.
The most important element in this relationship is that they’ve invested themselves in you. They’ve helped you grow, and they’ve been there for you through thick and thin.
They love you so deeply that they just don’t want to see any harm come to you. In their efforts to shelter you, they try to talk you out of your own instincts and dreams. They say things like, “Keep the ‘safe’ job; your vision is too risky,” or “You can’t move to a vineyard in Spain on a whim; you’ll have to start all over!”
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The Nurturer easily recalls past trials and quickly envisions all of the potential obstacles. She prioritizes safety over fulfillment.
MDV Edwards via Shutterstock
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Thank goodness some people’ve gone before us in all life’s endeavors. Sometimes there is that person, who in all fairness, has a helpful breadth of knowledge and experience, but who sees a singular blueprint for building a life and misguidedly discounts your own development.
They are constantly telling you how they did it, and when you act independently of their advice, the Expert cannot understand why you didn’t “listen” to them.
The Expert doesn’t want to fix it unless it’s broken. They see any differing choice as a waste of time reinventing the wheel, and prioritize efficiency over growth.
A study of future time perspective, goals, and social relationships showed how this can result from a disparity in the ways we think about the future. “Individuals who perceived future time as being limited prioritized emotionally meaningful goals, whereas individuals who perceived their futures as open-ended prioritized instrumental or knowledge-related goals.”
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Some people wholeheartedly embrace your vision so fervently that they make you feel like you’re not moving quickly enough. They’re excited you have a direction and a passion for something, and you soon find them hanging over you with a To-Do list in one hand and a whip in the other.
They cannot understand why you’re deliberating, processing, meditating, and conversing when you should just be doing, doing, doing. The Taskmaster sees life as a series of “to-dos.” He’s flummoxed by the “to be” or “I am.” They’re a suck-it-up-and-get-on-with-it kind of person who prioritizes circumstantial results over organic process.
They don’t mean to hurt you. They think they’re being helpful, but you walk away feeling beaten down and doubtful after talking to them, then struggle to have faith in yourself, your dream, and especially your Truth (with a capital T).
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These conversations also make you a lot less likely to seek support from them or anyone else during a time that you really need it the most. There is hope, however, and luckily for both of you, a little understanding goes a long way.
Triffany Hammond is a Certified Life Coach who teaches tools that help high-powered women realize their dreams of success and happiness, professionally and personally.
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