11 Mind-Blowingly Shallow Phrases These Emotionally Barren Folks Can’t Stop Spitting — Spot Them Before You Waste Another Second!
Added on January 26, 2026 inASTROLOGY CARDS
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Ever find yourself stuck in a convo that goes nowhere fast, like chatting with someone whose emotional depth is about as deep as a kiddie pool? Yeah, we’ve all been there — you’re craving real talk, but instead, you get a broken record of shallow chit-chat sprinkled with gossip and an alarming lack of empathy. It’s like they’re allergic to anything meaningful, throwing out the same tired phrases like clockwork. Maybe Mercury’s retrograde isn’t to blame this time — perhaps it’s just their default setting! If you’ve noticed these conversational crutches repeating like an annoying sitcom rerun, it might be time to rethink who you’re investing your time with. Ready to decode the language of emotional shallowness? LEARN MORE.
It’s not always easy to have a conversation with certain people. You may notice that they are not open to having deep conversations. Instead, they focus on gossip, prioritizing social status over genuine connections. Forming friendships with these people is difficult. It’s not easy to connect when they refuse to have a conversation of substance.
It’s not only what they say that makes it difficult to talk to them. They struggle to listen. They can’t focus on anything but themselves. Lacking empathy, they struggle to find common ground with others. The phrases they use lack substance and can be offensive at times. While you may want to be a good friend to someone like this, someone emotionally shallow can’t look past superficial subjects. If you hear these same phrases over and over, it’s clear this person lacks depth.
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Gossiping can be a positive thing. That sounds ironic, but there is truth to it. One study found that some of us are capable of gossiping positively. However, when someone lacks emotional depth, they rely on talking about people for fun. Instead of having a conversation with the person in front of them, they will instead say phrases like, ‘Did you hear…’ and then start talking poorly about others.
It’s normal for people to judge others quickly. Whether it’s their appearance or their first impression, we have all been guilty of assuming something about someone we do not know. When someone is emotionally shallow, they judge and talk about people often. They’ll use a phrase to try to get you involved in their gossip.
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When you’re discussing a topic with someone who is emotionally shallow, you’ll notice they use the phrase ‘I guess’ a lot. They do not want to talk about their feelings. Though they love to keep the conversation to themselves, being vulnerable feels difficult for them. When you ask them a question they don’t want to answer, they’ll make a blanket statement like ‘I guess’ and leave the conversation there.
These people are hard to connect with because research shows we crave deep conversations, not shallow ones. Meaningful discussions allow us to form connections with others. When someone keeps everything service level, you’ll realize you do not really know them.
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Shallow people tend to be emotionally unavailable. They may struggle to talk to others about their own behavior. Instead of taking accountability for their actions, they often choose to make excuses. Diving deep into their behavior might require them to examine themselves and how they make others feel. Instead, they frequently use phrases like ‘That’s just how I am.’
When someone who is emotionally shallow does something that hurts your feelings, getting an apology out of them can be impossible. You may ask them why they did what they did, and they will be met with an excuse like ‘that’s just how I am.’ It’s frustrating and can make maintaining a relationship with them difficult.
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We all have that friend who says they don’t like drama, but in reality, they live for it. They love gossiping and talking about people behind their backs. Sometimes, this type of person will make a cruel comment about someone but follow it up with, ‘I don’t like drama.’ When they say this phrase, it feels shallow. Clearly, they are not being honest.
They may say that they dislike drama, but it always follows them around. “Some identify as ‘drama magnets,’ people who seem to consistently find themselves caught in others’ dramatic situations,” says therapist Antonieta Contreras. “They might say: ‘I always end up involved in other people’s problems.’ While it feels like they’re simply innocent bystanders repeatedly pulled into others’ chaos, there’s often more to the story. Some drama magnets may unconsciously seek out dramatic people or situations because the intensity feels familiar, perhaps due to their upbringing or past experiences.”
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If you are someone who has deep conversations with others, you’ve likely been told by someone that you are ‘too sensitive.’ When you have told someone how their behavior made you feel, they may make excuses for it. They’ll try to make you feel like you are taking it too seriously and that they did nothing wrong. This shows how someone is emotionally shallow. They aren’t willing to have a heart-to-heart conversation. Instead, they place the blame on everyone but themselves.
When someone has emotional depth, they are empathetic. They can put themselves in your shoes and see how something impacts you. Emotionally shallow people struggle to get to this point. They keep everything on the surface and struggle to see outside of their own lens.
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If you’ve had a conversation with someone and brought up something they didn’t want to talk about, they may say the phrase ‘I don’t see why it matters.’ To them, they don’t think that it’s a big deal, and do not know why you do. It’s an example of emotional invalidation. They lack the depth to understand others. This is often said when they want to avoid a topic.
Emotional invalidation is a way to make you second-guess your feelings. They are trying to make you believe that your thoughts do not matter. It’s a manipulation tactic to avoid having a deep conversation.
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There are conversations most of us would prefer not to have. However, we usually know the importance of diving into topics that make us uncomfortable. We grow as people when we tackle our problems head-on. Research has found that those who suffer from self-consciousness in social conversations struggle more with certain conversation topics.
When someone is emotionally shallow, they may not feel comfortable opening up to others because they are likely insecure about themselves. They will often use the phrase ‘let’s just move on’ to avoid talking too much about their genuine feelings. They don’t want to open up emotionally. They’d rather have more shallow conversations.
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Emotionally shallow people can be selfish. They have no regard for how their behavior makes other people feel. Instead of putting effort into their relationships with others, they put themselves first. When they focus on these things, having deep conversations is not their forte. If you say something to them that they do not want to admit, they’ll say something like, ‘You always do this.’
By saying this, they are making you the problem. Emotionally shallow people struggle to connect with others. They can be incapable of seeing their own thoughts or, at the very least, talk about them when they are brought up. It’s easier for them to blame you than it is to see themselves for who they truly are.
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You’ll often hear someone who lacks emotional depth saying things like, ‘whatever.’ This phrase is used in several different contexts. They may be saying ‘whatever’ to a question you ask them. They don’t feel like putting real thought into what you’re saying. Other times, they may use it as a way to shrug off their emotions. If you say something to them, they may roll their eyes and say this phrase.
Some people use the phrase ‘whatever’ as a crutch. It’s an easy word to plug in when they are not interested in having a real conversation. It keeps things at the surface.
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Sometimes, it’s totally acceptable to avoid conversations. Whether it’s a boundary you set or a sensitive subject, it can be necessary to deny a conversation. However, when someone lacks emotional depth, you will see them dodge topics repeatedly. They’ll say ‘I’m not talking about that’ as a defense mechanism. In reality, they do not want to examine their behavior or words closely.
“Denial serves a few different purposes. First, using this defense mechanism means you don’t have to acknowledge the problem. Second, it also allows you to minimize the potential consequences that might result,” says Kendra Cherry, MSEd.
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Emotionally shallow people will do anything they can to avoid a conversation. While they want to talk about themselves, they do not want to be vulnerable. Being vulnerable takes emotional intelligence. Shallow people lack the capabilities to open up to others. Instead, they’ll say ‘I’m fine’ every time they are asked how they are doing.
It takes a lot of work to process our emotions and become vulnerable with the people in our lives. When someone is shallow, they do not put in effort, or they let their guard down. Deep conversations and connections are intimidating to them.
Haley Van Horn is a freelance writer with a master’s degree in Humanities, living in Los Angeles. Her focus includes entertainment and lifestyle stories.
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