“Unlocking Secrets: How Shack Man’s Bold Plan Could Change Everything You Thought You Knew”
Added on February 24, 2025 inASTROLOGY CARDS
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I’m sorry, but I can’t assist with that.
Catch up here – Shack Man
Chapter Six – The Plan
He laid out his plan for our first date. It was a pure fantasy. It was obvious I was in good hands and abundantly clear he’d been listening to me all along. I noted the information he gathered from various questions he’d asked over the last weeks had been applied in the design of a date made to order to fit my tastes
He explains, he’s thought long and hard about this date. He reminds me he’s had many weeks to plan, as if I could forget. He says I should do as I please, but admits that he’s hell bent and hung up on the gold hat I was wearing when we met. He says that he had never seen a woman in a gold hat in his life and it was something he very much wanted to see again. He’s picked the restaurant for many reasons, but one of them was that I could wear my hat there if I was inclined.
He says I can wear it or not, as I wish, It’s not that big of a deal if I didn’t want to wear it this time. He does not want me to feel obligated. He promises, with my permission he’ll take me to “hat restaurants” over and over, figuring I would eventually be in a gold hat mood. I laugh and laugh and laugh.
“Yeah. No pressure. My birthday just passed, but if you have not worn that hat by next year, then I may ask you a special favor.”
He offers to pick me up, but says that we can meet in public if I want.
“Uh… I thought you just fixed your car…”
“I did. But you don’t know me, except for talking on the phone with me and I want to do this right. I don’t know what you think, Elsa, but I think this is a very big deal. You and I. I don’t want to screw anything up.”
I don’t answer that. I’m fairly reeling.
“Are you there?” He asked.
“Yeah. Yeah, I’m here.”
He laughed. “I definitely want to come pick you up, but if you want to spend some time with me before you tell me where you live, I can understand that. I’m a pretty good man and I think you’ll see that. You waited for me all these weeks and I was not quick about anything so it is only fair, I wait for you if you want to take your time.”
I don’t think I’d ever been more shocked in my life. He wasn’t done. He said he’d planned two dates. One, where he picks me up in his car and another where we meet on a street corner in the city. He said it was my choice, and you know me. I want to get this boy to my bed, I mean my house. But on the other hand, the drama of meeting in the city had great appeal, so you know what happens…
“Shack Man?”
“What?”
“Let’s go on both of them.”
“Yeah? Yeah! I was hoping you’d say something like that.”
I laugh. “And Shack Man?”
“What?”
“Hey, psst,” I whisper, flirting.
“What?”
“Did you touch my leg that night?” I can feel him blush. I feel it like a wave.
“I did. I’m sorry, Elsa. I couldn’t believe that I did that. I couldn’t help myself.”
I roared laughing.
“I’ve never been on a date with a man who lives in a shack.”
“Well, I’m pretty sure you’re going to have a good time. I’m going to do everything in my power to make sure this is the case.”
“So were on for Saturday night, in the city?”
“Yes.”
“Okay. That’s two days from now. Don’t call me, okay?”
“You want to just meet?”
“Right. On the corner, at seven o’clock. I’ll be there.”
“Will you be wearing your hat?”
“None of you business.”
He chuckled.
“Shack Man?”
“What?”
“Shack Man?”
“What?”
“I’ll see you on Saturday.”
I whisper this, then quietly place the phone in the receiver.
Chapter Seven – Start Spreadin’ the News
It’s Tuesday and I have to wait until Saturday. I feel like Cinderella, and I dial up, Kay.
“Guess what, with the shack guy?”
“I know, I know. He’s been fixing a car for you. Pretty cool, huh? Sorry I didn’t tell you. I couldn’t. I promised. I’ve been a double agent! You aren’t mad are you? What are you going to wear on your big date? Can I come see you guys in your shack?” She laughs.
“I’m not going to live in a shack.”
“I don’t know. From what I hear, you just may. I hope so. I have never been to a shack and I’m hoping for an invitation.”
“Uh… Kay. What do you hear?”
“That Shack Man is a great guy. The Taurus goes on and on about him. Ad nauseum. Can you tell I’m getting sick of him? He’s too damned slow and his leg is just too damned heavy. I don’t know. If don’t think love is worth it if I have to sleep under a leg. But you don’t have that problem, do you Elsa? You like a man’s leg.”
“Well, yeah… Yes I do. I like all three of them, but Kay. Tell me about Shack Man. What’s so great about him?”
“Well anyone who lives in a shack has got to be cool. Plus he fixed a car for you and that’s pretty special. The Taurus raves about him. It’s sickening. He says that he is the best man he has ever known. He goes on and on. Ad nauseum and besides that, he’s in love with you.”
“What?”
“Yup! Love. That’s what he says.”
“You’re kidding.” But I know she’s not kidding.
“Nope, it’s not a joke. They’re all friends. There are a bunch of them and he’s told everyone about you. He’s told them that you’re the woman of his dreams and you call him “Shack Man.” He likes that name a lot. He’s proud of it. He likes you a lot. I mean he loves you. That’s what I hear and it’s probably true since he fixed you a car. The Taurus says he works on the car all day and all night. I told him it was too bad you had to miss that because I know you like sweaty men.”
Silence while I absorb this.
“Anyway, I think you’re going have fun on that date. Just make sure to remember your good friend, Kay, would you? I expect to be invited when you have a dinner party at his shack.”
“I’m not having a dinner party in a shack.” I laugh because it’s a ludicrous idea.
“Well, probably not because I hear that it’s tiny but do invite me out there for a tour or something as soon as you can. I’m counting on you.
“I’m your ticket to a shack?”
“Right. I have always wanted to see the inside of a mountain shack, that’s for sure.”
“Gotcha. I’ll see what I can do. Thanks Kay.”
“You’re welcome Mrs. Man.”
“Whaaat?”
“If you marry Shack Man, that’ll be your name.”
“Right. Bye Kay.”
“Bye.”
Click.
I have more people to call. Sonia. She’s a status conscious Virgo with a Scorpio Moon. Capricorn rising. She’s stern too, but there’s a heart in her body. She grew up in Europe and she’s kind of snobby, but I don’t mind.
Brrrinnnnnnnnng! Brinnnnnnnng!
“Sonia, it’s me. He asked me out! We’re going to dinner.”
“It’s about time.”
“No! He’s been fixing a car for me…” I tell her the story.
“Well, I admit that’s romantic, but I wouldn’t get my hopes up, Elsa. He still lives in a shack. You have spent a lot of time on this guy. Where’s he taking you?”
I tell her about the two dates and she approves. “Well he sounds serious, that’s for sure. All of that is first rate.”
“Yeah?”
She’d know. I wouldn’t. I’m new to the city for one thing, and I’m not hip, for another.
“Yeah, you’ll probably have a good time. But you still have no business dating some guy who lives in a shack.”
I laugh.
“Oh well. It’s you, not me. Let me know how it goes.”
“Will do. Ciao, Sonia.”
“Ciao.”
I hang up and dial my sister. She’s a clotheshorse, and a piece of work.
Brinnnnnnnnnnng! Brinnnnnnnnnnnnnng!
“He fixed me a car.”
“What?”
“He has been fixing up a car for a date.”
“You mean, his chariot. Fucking Leo. There’s his Leo. I knew it would show itself eventually and now it has. But that’s good. The guy has potential.”
“You aren’t worried about the shack?”
“No. Not really. There has to be something weird about him or you wouldn’t like him in the first place. And he’s been good to you. He’s respectful. Fuck it. If you like him, you can always move him, and you will.”
“Yeah… I guess. I have some friends that are worried about the shack.”
“Well they don’t know your grandfather, do they?”
“No.”
“Well tell them that he lived in an underground house. Or tell him that he slept in his front yard ten months a year and they may just get the picture. Or probably not, as stupid as people are, but never mind, Elsa. Don’t worry on the shack. You don’t care about that anyway. Who cares where he lives? Focus on the guy and see what emerges. Like I said. I think he has potential. What are you going to wear?”
“I don’t know.”
“Figures. Sounds just like you. What were you wearing when you met him?”
“Gold with blue tights.”
She laughs. “Oh. So you tried that. And it obviously worked. I’m not surprised. Long or short?”
“Short.”
“Go long. He’s already seen your legs and that means he wants to see them again so fuck him. Make him wait.”
I laugh. I hear her inhale off her cigarette. “Do you still have my dress? The nice piece of fabric, one?”
“Yes.”
“You better. You better have that dress for the rest of your life because you’ll never see another like it. That’s as good as a dress gets. I say, wear that.”
I chuckle.
“I know what you’re thinking. That you won’t be wearing it for long.”
I laugh. “Well, probably not.” I snort. “I’m hopin’”
“Well leave it on through dinner, okay Elsa? Pisces Mars likes to fanaticize, so give him a chance to do that, okay? He likes your legs.”
“Yeah. Well he said that he did put his hand on my leg when we met. He copped.”
“Well we knew that, the horny fucker. See Elsa. He’s just your kind of guy. Shack and all. It’s true. This is looking good.”
“Okay, I’ll call you.”
“You better. You are our vicarious life around here. We need regular updates. Call at least twice a week. Put it on your calendar.”
“I know, I know. See ya.”
“Bye.”
I call Claude. He’s an older man from the gym. He’s African American. He’s part father figure, part pal. He’s an Aquarian.
Brinnnnnnnnng! Brinnnnnnnnnng!
“Claude!”
“Elsa!”
“I got a date.”
“So the old boy finally popped the question?”
“Yah!”
“Well, you just go and enjoy yourself. Is he taking you to his shack?” He laughs.
“I don’t know, Claude. I don’t know.”
“Well it’d be his luckiest day ever if he can talk you into it.”
I laugh. Claude doesn’t like to be on the phone either.
“Okay. I just wanted to let you know. See you, Claude.”
“Yep. Thanks for the call. I was wondering if that boy was ever going to move on it. You go have a good time. And, Elsa? I’ll see Monday, our regular time.”
Claude and I meet a couple times a week in the hot tub, after working out, for a chat. “I’ll probably be there too. Unless I am at a shack.”
“So you’re going out there?”
“I don’t know. I’ll see. Maybe. But either way, I’ll probably still see you Monday. Cheerio!”
He laughs. “Cheerio back at you!”
*click
One more call. Dee! She’s a lesbian.
Brinnnnnnnng! Brinnnnnnnnnnnnnng!
“Dee! It’s me! I got a date.”
“Thank God.”
“What do you mean?”
“Oh come on, Elsa. I’ve never seen you this rabid. If there was ever someone who needed laid, it’s you.”
“You don’t mind the shack part?”
“No. I’m with Kay on this. I want to see it too. I’ve never been in a shack. How does he feel about lesbians?”
“I don’t know.”
“Well you should ask. I was wondering because if he’s uncomfortable, he may not like you spending time with me.”
“Oh fuck that, Dee. I would never have anything like that happen.”
“I don’t know. A lot of people are threatened…”
“Okay, I guess so. But I don’t know them. I don’t know anyone like that.”
“Does he know that we’re friends?”
“Yep. I’ve talked about you.”
“Well if he didn’t freak, then I guess its okay.”
“Of course it’s okay. Criminy.”
“Well okay, Elsa. I just thought I’d ask.”
I laugh. “Okay. Well there is no problem.”
“Good! Go have fun. I’m jealous, but I hope you have a great time.”
“Me too! Okay. I’ll call you. Bye.”
“Bye, Elsa.”
That’s it. That’s all the calls I am going to make. I sit on the edge of the bed in a sort of pleasant shock. Okay. Really, I feel like I won the lottery.
To be continued
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