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9 Sneaky Friendship Fails Only the Psychics (and Your BFF) Can Spot From a Mile Away!

Added on December 13, 2025 inASTROLOGY CARDS

Ever wonder why we cling to toxic friendships like a cat to a laser pointer? It’s funny — or maybe tragic — how the Capricorn moon today urges us to be practical and cut ties, yet our hearts stubbornly hold on to those “once upon a time” besties who’ve now turned into emotional landmines. We keep hoping they’ll morph back into the fairy-tale kind of friend or lover, but spoiler alert: some people just don’t get the memo on kindness and respect. Real love listens, respects boundaries, and doesn’t play hide-and-seek with your feelings. So, why do we stay and swallow the nonsense? Because breaking up with toxicity feels like tearing apart your own story — painful, messy, but totally necessary for your soul’s glow-up. Ready to spot the nine dead giveaways that scream “bad friend” louder than a Leo on stage? Let’s dive in before Mercury retrograde has you obsessing over the drama again. LEARN MORE.

Oftentimes, we hold on to toxic people and friendships because, in the beginning, they weren’t toxic at all. They might have been the best friend or boyfriend you’ve ever had, so you hold on to hope. You hope they will change and treat you the way they once did, and that’s why you stay and take the abuse.

Someone who truly loves you won’t abuse or manipulate you. They would never put themselves in a position to lose or harm you. That means your friend or significant other will be mindful of how they treat you and listen when you tell them how you want to be treated.

But a bad friend or partner couldn’t care less about how they treat you. They just want to please themselves. Whether it’s a breakup or the end of a friendship, keep in mind that you must do what’s best for you. It hurts having to tell the person you love that they can no longer be a part of your future, but holding on to toxic relationships only harms you. Don’t forget the reasons you are removing them from your life.

Here are 9 things bad people do in friendships that normal people see right through:

1. They diminish your dreams

woman who is a bad person in the friendship as she no longer supports other woman Miljan Zivkovic / Shutterstock

Nothing kills more dreams than doubt. A good friend or partner will encourage you to pursue your dreams. They want to help you as much as they can, because they believe in you. Plus, they want to see you challenge yourself. Regardless of whether or not you achieve the goal, they’ll still be there to support you. Research on children and young athletes shows that frequent and intense negative feedback can lower confidence levels. A true friend, on the other hand, wants to see you stretch yourself and grow.

2. They dismiss your feelings

bad woman in friendship who dismisses the feelings of her friend MDV Edwards / Shutterstock

A toxic person will make you feel as if your feelings are invalid and that you’re overreacting. They refuse to see things from your point of view. A toxic friend or partner doesn’t care about how you feel, whereas a true friend or partner is always there to hear your views.

A study conducted at Harvard University revealed that students who were invalidated after expressing their emotions in a stressful situation felt worse and showed a greater stress response. From a psychological perspective, repeated invalidation can erode self-esteem and the willingness to share vulnerable thoughts.

3. They don’t take responsibility for their actions

woman who is a bad person in friendship as she blames other woman BearFotos / Shutterstock

A bad friend or partner doesn’t take responsibility for their actions. Whenever they do something wrong, it’s never their fault. They take on the victim role and vilify you. A toxic person refuses to be accountable for their actions, without any regard for who they hurt in the process.

As licensed marriage and family therapist Karyl McBride explained, the cornerstone of narcissism is a lack of empathy, and this is what causes their lack of accountability. The pattern typically unfolds the same way every time: Narcissists and abusers use blame-shifting as a pattern of behavior that doesn’t ease up, and this allows them to avoid any accountability for bad behavior.

4. They lie

woman who is a bad person in friendships as she isn't transparent Kmpzzz / Shutterstock

Bad friends lie or repeatedly withhold the truth from you. They want to keep you at a distance, so it’s easier to manipulate you. They know that if they told you what they were doing, you would end the relationship. A toxic person hides things from you because they want to have their cake and eat it too.

There’s evidence that prolific liars share the personality trait of Machiavellianism, meaning they are manipulative and exploitative of others. Research published in 2023 found that people who lie tend to assume that others are lying too, and this impedes their ability to form genuine social connections.

5. They tear you down

woman who is a bad friend in friendships as she attacks woman's self-esteem Ekateryna Zubal / Shutterstock

Bad friends aim to tear you down. They don’t want you to have self-confidence because when you have self-confidence, you no longer tolerate their abuse, and you’ll know your worth. An abusive friend or partner lives off the ability to manipulate you and make themselves seem superior by comparison.

According to research from the University of Texas at Dallas, emotional abuse is an ongoing process in which one person systematically erodes another person’s self-esteem. Similar to brainwashing, constant abuse can wear away at a victim’s self-confidence and sense of self-worth — the goal is control.

6. They don’t invest in the friendship

woman who is a bad person in friendships as she doesn't invest in relationship Andrii Iemelianenko / Shutterstock

Relationships require both people to put in the effort. When you’re in a bad relationship, your friend or partner expects you to pull all the weight. They never want to reciprocate. Bad friends continue to take from a relationship without putting anything back into it. They’re simply in it for their own benefit.

Social exchange theory points out that relationships thrive on mutual investment, and when you consistently find yourself compromising your time without reciprocal effort, it could be time to reflect on the overall health of the friendship. If you feel like your friend’s neediness is suffocating or they only reach out when it’s convenient for them, it might not be a healthy and stable friendship.

7. They make you walk on eggshells

woman who is a bad person in friendships as people are scared to make her angry ArtMari / Shutterstock

You should never be afraid of getting hurt by your partner or friend if you say something they don’t agree with. You should be able to open up and express yourself without any fear. Being scared to open up to them based on how they’ll react further proves you’re in a toxic relationship.

Red flags that you’re walking on eggshells include feeling afraid of your partner and worrying about angering them. Research shows that this constant state of anxiety can stem from unpredictable moods, past explosive reactions, or the fear of repercussion.

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8. They try to control everything

man who is a bad person in a friendship as he is controlling Ekateryna Zubal / Shutterstock

Bad friends make you feel powerless in a relationship. It’s either their way or the highway. They want you to act a certain way, so they do so by controlling you and not allowing you to make your own decisions. Toxic people are in the relationship for themselves. They don’t want to hear about your problems; they just want you to listen to their problems and help them solve them. These negative people think that a relationship is all about them, and that the needs of the other person don’t need to be met.

Studies have found that bad friendships can be characterized by an imbalance of power such that one friend is dominant over the other, and these dynamics contribute to controlling behaviors like preventing a friend from making their own decisions or making them feel bad about their ideas. If you’ve ever felt like you can’t speak up or have your opinions respected without pushback, you might not be not imagining it.

9. They don’t appreciate you

woman who is a bad person in friendships as she doesn't appreciate people Josep Suria / Shutterstock

A bad friend never expresses how thankful they are to have you. Toxic people never acknowledge all the sacrifices you made to keep them happy. It’s like they never see all the hard work you put into the relationship, but still expect you to do more.

Toxic people tend to operate from a place of entitlement that makes expressing gratitude nearly impossible for them. Research published in 2024 found that narcissism involves a sense of superiority and feelings of entitlement, and this can block someone from recognizing the value of what others do for them or give them.

Tamara Sanon is a writer and editor with a passion for covering health and wellness, relationships, astrology, and lifestyle topics. Her bylines have appeared on Unwritten, NSM Today, and Orlando Weekly, among others.