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5 Surprisingly Simple Parenting Hacks a Therapist Swears By to Raise Kids Who Actually Love You (Yes, Really)

Added on June 4, 2025 inASTROLOGY CARDS

Parenting gets thrown around with words like “amazing” so casually these days it’s enough to make any seasoned mom or dad wince. After all, juggling tantrums, triumphs, and those head-scratching moments that make you wonder if your kid just decoded a secret alien language is no picnic—even under a cosmic sky sprinkled with Jupiter’s expansive optimism and Saturn’s relentless discipline. Spoiler alert: no one’s perfect. Yet, some parents navigate this wild ride with a blend of grit and grace that’s anything but ordinary. They’re not helicoptering, ignoring, or cracking the whip—they’re doing something nuanced, genuine, and oddly effective. Curious how they pull it off? Buckle up, because unpacking these 5 parenting styles might just flip your perspective on what it means to raise a kid who’s not just surviving but truly thriving. LEARN MORE

I cringe at the word “amazing” when used to describe parents. Let’s face it, parenthood is not for the weak and squeamish, and even on our best days as parents, we can fail one moment and succeed brilliantly the next. 

I have known some great parents who have withstood their children’s hardships, failures, and brilliance. These parents aren’t overindulgent, uninvolved, or authoritarian — but they are not perfect, either. So, how do they do it?

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Here are 5 parenting styles that create happy, healthy kids, according to a therapist

1. The ‘I’m here for you’ parent shows up emotionally, not just physically

The “here for you” parent is responsive and emotionally engaged. “Responsive and nurturing parenting is the key to optimal early childhood development; it allows the young brain to develop in a way that is less aggressive and more emotionally stable, social, and empathic. Good early childhood development leads to good human development,” stated research in The Keio Journal of Medicine. 

Great parents respond promptly, show genuine interest in their children, and do so in relevant ways. This kind of response promotes engagement, growth of vocabulary, and encourages conversation. The crucial reason to give your child a quick and relevant response is that it communicates that you are listening and that what they are saying is valuable. The engaged “here for you” parent makes their children feel heard and understood and sends a message that the world is safe, they are valuable enough, and will succeed at what they do.

As a working mother of three with busy schedules, making time for each child was a stretch, and I often felt inadequate. This is why I applaud the families who sacrifice earning potential to have a stay-at-home parent. If you are one of those who help with homework, listen to your child’s worries, or celebrate their success, know you are an exemplary parent. However, if you were more like me, simply trying hard to be a consistent, reliable presence, know that being good enough is also OK.

RELATED: 8 Ways Old-School Parents Got It So Right — Before Gentle Parenting Was Even A Thing

2. The ‘follow-through’ parent means what they say (and doesn’t lose their cool)

Mother creates happy kid by following through PeopleImages.com – Yuri A via Shutterstock

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The follow-through parent sets and reinforces boundaries & consequences.

Effective parents understand that natural consequences are key to their child’s learning and get out of the way when these occur. The best part is that when the consequence of their actions occurs, this parent releases judgment, scolding, and criticism and continues to be flexible and understanding while guiding their children through the learning process. This helps children understand the impact of their actions without feeling they have lost a parent’s love.

I consider Emily an amazing mother. Although she grew up in a household where punishment was harsh and relentless, she promotes an attitude of accountability and responsibility by allowing her teenage children to manage their own time. When they fail to complete homework, are late for the bus, or neglect chores, she doesn’t scold, roll her eyes, or overreact but discusses what they can do differently next time. This approach helps them learn responsibility and time management without feeling resentful.

RELATED: Dad-To-Be Asks Fellow Parents Why Everyone Is Warning Him About Parenthood — ‘Is It Really That Bad?’

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3. The proactive parent talks with their kids, not at them

The proactive parent uses communication to prepare their kids and reinforce values.

Good communication is the difference between average and good parenting. That’s why you will see amazing parents listen more than they preach, discuss rather than tell, and demonstrate respect for their children’s values, thoughts, feelings, and opinions. Proactive engagement in discussions teaches values and reasoning, builds character, and encourages personal growth to foster an environment of mutual respect and understanding.

Jessica, a mother of two, is time-crunched with a busy career and a side hustle, so she uses weekly family meetings as a way to stay in touch and reinforce values and good judgment. This is when she shares her insights and discusses right and wrong and the need for gratitude. On these Friday evenings, her schedule is clear and there is time for everyone to speak up. This open dialogue helps her children develop strong communication skills and emotional intelligence.

A 2013 study of developmental changes in parent–child communication throughout adolescence showed how parental communication and information sharing fluctuates. Adolescent self-disclosure and concealment of information were influenced by gender, parental engagement, and timing.

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RELATED: 5 Secretly Effective Ways To Talk To Your Kids (So They Actually Listen)

4. The ‘shoulder to cry on’ parent makes emotional support a priority

Healthy kid cries in mother's arms fast-stock via Shutterstock

The “shoulder to cry on,” parent is nurturing and supportive, a soft place for kids to land.

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So significant is nurture and support in the formation of a young person that it is critical both parents pull their weight, and the role is not fulfilled only by a mother. However, mothers are often recognized as the primary source of support and encouragement, helping their children build self-esteem and resilience, as supported by a study in Family Journal. They serve as the cheerleaders when things go well and the shoulder to cry on when life is tough. Since both scenarios are inevitable, children naturally turn to the parent who is consistently there for them.

For example, Maria, whose daughter struggles with anxiety, offers constant reassurance and support. She attends therapy sessions with her daughter, learns about anxiety management techniques, and practices them at home. Maria’s nurturing approach creates a comforting and secure environment for her daughter to flourish.

RELATED: 6 Things Parents Don’t Realize They Do That Breaks Their Kids’ Hearts, According To Experts

5. The ‘healthy stress’ parent teaches kids how to stay cool under pressure

The “healthy stress” parent models emotional intelligence.

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Great parents who manage their emotions effectively, have good boundaries and respectful relationships, demonstrate healthy ways to cope with stress and frustration, and navigate the world. This modeling provides their children with the necessary skills to navigate the world and their future.

Consider Anna, who was faced with a stressful situation, took a deep breath, and calmly addressed the issue. Ana speaks up and stands up for herself, and her children observe and learn from her example, understanding that it’s OK to feel stressed but important to handle it healthily, and good boundaries support wellbeing.

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A study of 15-39-month-old children on how children cope with frustration and tantrums and the effect of maternal and paternal behaviors explained, “parents are not only important for how children manage negative emotions but also how children’s emotional self-regulation for challenging situations develops.”

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RELATED: Kids Who Were Raised By Helicopter Parents Exhibit These 4 Unhealthy Traits As Adults

The goal is to balance a little of all five parenting types.

Being a parent who makes the world a better place isn’t about perfection; it’s about being present, understanding, communicating, supporting, and emotionally intelligent, traits that create a nurturing environment where children feel valued and respected, and grow into secure, successful, and emotionally intelligent individuals. While it’s easy to feel like we fall short, remember the journey of parenthood is ongoing, and every effort we make contributes to the well-being of our children.

Besides modeling a loving spousal relationship (when possible), these parents don’t ignore the basics. They say “I am sorry”, “thank you”, “I am so proud of you” every day, so their kids learn to do the same.

RELATED: Child Psychologist Who Studied Over 200 Kids Says This Parenting Style ‘Works Better Than The Rest’

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Reta Faye Walker is a therapist who specializes in healing relationships. She offers one-on-one sessions, couples retreats, and courses to help couples get back on track.

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